My palms sweat, my heart flutters and I try to remain outwardly calm. Inside I am a raging volcano. I’m incredibly excited about my first ever book signing! I’m practicing my signature so you can read it. I keep trying different pens to see which one is best (I think I like the gel pens because I don’t have enough flair in my signature for a Flair pen).
I made an event on Facebook, sent a press release to the newspaper, and I am sure it will hit the front page of the Sunday edition, and I printed up posters for Hastings’ front door. I’ve picked out my outfit. Now what? I need to relax. I need to get on with my life and get back to writing the three books waiting patiently on my computer that are being neglected.
I’m a writer. I am driven to write and put on paper things others don’t see. Or they see them, but not with the artists eye. I want to be the best of the best, so I practice my craft and strive to show how interesting life is – not just drift through it trudging to work each day for someone else. I want to hold a mirror up to the world and say, “look at what is happening around you – the world is beautiful, or the world is sad, or heartbreaking, or horrific,” but never mundane. I want to leave a legacy – to be remembered.
No wonder I’m nervous about the book signing. I set the bar a little high.
In my quest for balance in my life this year I am planning to do more writing for myself and less for contests. I’ve learned a lot from contests but even more from my fellow writers, editors and publishers. The support I get from the writers in the Enid Writers’ Club, Oklahoma Writers Federation and Oklahoma Women Bloggers has shoved me over the edge into a new world of writing.